Dear Faithful Readers
I am moving into the next generation and creating audio versions of my most popular blog posts. Eventually I hope to have audio files for all the posts however this is a slightly daunting project so for now we'll be marking all the updated entries with a *.
You can also visit our YouTube page www.YouTube.com/Singlemarriedgirl for all the updated posts.
Thank you for your continued support and please share the links. There are a lot of Singlemarriedgirls (and boys) out there looking for a voice.
A search of self-discovery from a woman facing for the first time the world of dating, love, life and independence following a decade+ of married life. Funny, poignant, quirky and cool, Laurel is the girl you always thought you wanted to be...until you read her blog!
Friday, January 18, 2013
Saturday, January 5, 2013
Approval
I’ve been thinking about God, the Universe, Karma and all things divine lately. I am facing some pretty scary things, fallout from my past which is still lingering like a little dingle berry on the adorably dimpled butt of an otherwise perfect ass though ironically I am also happier, healthier and more satisfied in my life and my path than I have been in years. Wait, did I just call myself an ass? Ah well, I suppose that is the way of things. The path is never easy or clear…or maybe it’s never easy or clear for me.
For anyone who doesn’t know me, I am a staunchly undecided
Universalist Agnostic. Clear as mud, eh?
Ok, I believe in a higher power though I am never comfortable with the very
limiting label of “God”. Too many things
attach to that nom de plume. I think
everyone has it a little right and a lot wrong.
I do think there is an intelligent energy or entity, call it love, that
surrounds and protects us, wishes the best for us and occasionally comes to
visit in a form which the viewer can recognize and understand.
But as I was considering this idea, I started to wonder
about something. If we are truly made in
the image and form of this divine parent, then does God enjoy the same things
we do?
Does she laugh at Guilty Dog? Does she secretly play solitaire then quickly
change her screen as soon as one of the seraphim walks in? Does she enjoy bad karaoke and good
pasta? Does she ever take eternal
duckface pictures which no human may look upon?
And does her heart break as ours do when we see humans
hurting one other in her name? Does she
feel the frustration of inadequate gun control and ineffective medical
care? Does she have time to keep up or
does she too get her news from Jon Stewart and Twitter?
How often have you had to ask yourself, how will my mother
feel about this, my father? Will my
family still love me, support me? Will
my friends turn away?
And how often have we asked God’s forgiveness without asking
it of our friends, our family, ourselves?
I know we are all flawed versions of something greater than ourselves,
but perhaps the closest we can get to God isn’t to try and live by some
outdated doctrine or xenophobic guideline.
Perhaps the truest representation of your God, Universe, Love, Nirvana,
Heaven on Earth or whatever is simply to think if God’s heart also beats as
yours, do you really want to break it?
Act in a way which makes you proud and happy and stop arguing about who
is the most right. Who the hell
cares? You won’t win God’s approval for
being the most right. You already have
it; your job is to live like you want it.
Thursday, January 3, 2013
New Year
It’s nothing new.
Everyone does it, takes stock as we approach the New Year on how this
particular year has stacked up against the previous ones. We all say thanks for the blessings we’ve
received and goodbye to the loved ones we’ve lost. We assess our life goals, health goals, career
goals and often coming short of our unrealistic expectations for what was possible
in one cycle of the sun, we vow to do better in the coming year.
For the last four December 31sts I have rung in the New Year
with hope for the future and a less than fond, “Don’t let the door hit you on
the way out” to the cr*p storm that comprised the previous 12 months. The problem with this yearly ritual is that
our judgment of our goals, accomplishments, joys and hardships is often clouded
by the events of the last couple months leading up to the event. You might completely brush aside the amazing
promotion you got in January because the bloom is off the rose a bit with the
reality of the day to day responsibilities or the longer commute. That tan from the week in Maui last February
has long since faded. And of course,
the end of the year, the beginning of the next often serves as a painful marker
for the loss of a loved one, knowing you are leaving his or her last year with
you and entering the first without him or her.
But that being said, I would like to propose a new ritual,
much like an advent calendar, a month long review of the year’s
accomplishments, successes and joys.
Thirty one days of pure, unadulterated self-praise. Because if you consider that you have only
had 365 (or 366 if it’s a leap year) days to accomplish all this, you will
realize that you had or more importantly made something good happen at least
10% of your year. And I’m not talking
about one of those daily affirmation, “I am grateful for” things, though those
also serve a noble purpose. I’m talking
about some full on indulgent self trumpeting.
Because my guess is, once you start stacking up all that you have done
or seen or enjoyed, once you become aware of the big as well as the little
successes and joys in your life, you will enter the new year not with a sense
of foreboding but with a sense of wonder and excitement at toppling the
previous year’s tally. And isn’t that
really what the new year is about? It’s
not about relief for what has past. It
is about excitement for what is to come.
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